Saturday, December 22, 2007
Seasonal Joy from Nearly All Over . . .
Nothing says Christmas like Good News from Nigeria.
The following appeared in my email box this morning (in what surely must be the most interesting example of English apart from the package instructions for Taiwanese condoms) announcing I'm apparently a very rich man. Here is the exact spelling and wording of that missive:
UNITED NATIONS (WORLD BANK ASSISTED PROGRAMME)
DIRECTORATE OF INTERNATIONAL PAYMENT AND TRANSFERS.
870 UNITED NATIONS PLAZA 20-ANEW YORK NY 10017
WIRE TRANSFER/AUDIT UNIT
Our Ref: WB/NF/UN/XX027
IRREVOCABLE RELEASE OF YOUR PAYMENT
We have actually been authorized by the presidency Federal Republic of Nigeria
and the governing board of central Bank of Nigeria , to investigate the
unnecessary delay of your payment, Recommended and approve your claims for payment if certified as genuine.
During the course of our investigation, we discovered with dismay that your
payment has been unnecessarily delayed by corrupt officials of the Bank who are
trying to divert your money into their private Accounts.also we discovered that
someone has presented an account were the money will be transfered to that you
have advised him to do so.We are advsing you to act on this findings and contact
the below authorites.
To forestall this, security for your funds was organized in the form of your
personal Identification Number (PIN) and your transfer access code (T.A.C.) this
will enable only you have direct control over this fund, we have also agreed
with the Presidency.
That we will handle this payment ourselves to avoid the hopeless situation
created by the Officials of the Central Bank of Nigeria, We obtained an
irrevocable payment guarantee on your Payment from the presidency we are happy
to inform you that based on our recommendation/instructions; your entire
Inheritances fund has been credited in your Favor through our overseas paying bank.
You are therefore advice to contact Mr.Fedrick Adams audit unit, Federal
Executive Council Office in Nigeria on this (Email:firstname.lastname@example.org ) to
collect your original payment slip with your pin and transfer access code. As
soon as you submit these codes and your Payment slip to your bank they will
credit your account without delay.
NOTE: YOU ARE ADVICED TO FURNISH DR FREDRICK WITH YOUR
TELEPHONE NUMBER VERY IMPORTANT AND CORRECT BANKING DETAILS TO AVOID TRANSFER OF THIS FUND INTO A WRONG ACCOUNT.
We expect your urgent response to this email (ma..email@example.com) to enable
us monitor this payment effectively.
United Nations Office